Guest Speaker

Last night we had a guest speaker from the pharmacy school, she was in her last year and hopes to graduate in May. Her topic was Anxiety and she did a fantastic job in explaining Anxiety, the causes and also did a lot of explaining about the different medications that helps to try to get some relief.

Anxiety disorders affect 12% of the population casing mild to severe impairment.
Depression/Anxiety continues to be Canada's fastest rising diagnosis from 1994-2004, Dr's visits have almost doubled. (In 2003 11.6 million visits to doctors across Canada about depression/anxiety)

Types of Anxiety disorders:

• generalized anxiety disorder
• specific phobia
• post traumatic stress
• social phobia OCD disorder panic disorder

Treatment for anxiety includes medication, behaviour modification therapy, psychotherapy, education, support groups.

Natural Health products  should not be used for depression/anxiety unless you talk to your Doctor first.

What Not to Say to Someone Who Is Depressed

What Not to Say to Someone Who Is Depressed

Even if you mean well, saying the wrong thing to a loved one or friend who is depressed might only make them feel worse.

Don’t say: “Lots of people are worse off than you are.” Even if this is true, it doesn’t feel that way at the moment, and does not help your loved one. Being told she is needlessly feeling sorry for herself could make her feel even worse.

Do say: “You’re not alone in this.”

Don’t say: “No one ever said life was fair.” This comes off as a dismissal of your friend’s feelings.

Do say: “You’re important to me.”

Don’t say: “Stop feeling sorry for yourself.” Your friend does not know how to stop feeling depressed. Depression is a physical illness, like diabetes or heart disease, and sufferers cannot get over it just by trying harder.

Do say: “Let me help you.”

Don’t say: “So you’re depressed. Aren’t you always?” This minimizes what can be a serious disorder.

Do say: “You are not going crazy.”

Don’t say: “It’s your own fault.” No one chooses depression.

Do say: “I’ll stick with you through this.”

Don’t say: “Believe me, I know how you feel. I was once depressed for several days.” Depression is different from just feeling sad or blue.

Do say: “I’ll do my best to understand.”

It Falls to You

When it comes to mental-health issues, general practitioners don’t have the training or experience to make more than the most cursory analysis and recommendations. For someone presenting symptoms of depression, the quick and easy solution for a doctor is often drugs. Some will send you for "talk" therapy first or do both if they have tried to keep up with mental health issues.

Once they give you something if you do not come back, they assume it is working, that is why we must go back if we find the drugs not working. You need to not be afraid to keep going back to change them until you and your Dr find the right ones.There is such a vast number of drugs out there it can take a long time to find the right one or combination to assist you.

Another thing, when you are seeing your Doctor make sure he checks  your blood pressure regularly, while sitting and standing up,,,mine dropped from 180/75 to 102/73 when I stood up. This is something new that is just coming to light, so at this point there is not a lot of investigation results yet. The drop in pressure is one reason I lose my balance and have a tendency to fall, the only thing we are not sure if it is happening because of the TIA's I had previously (which is what my Dr thinks) or side effects from the medications or something else altogether.

Hope this information helps you to keep searching for  help/answers.

Pushing Myself

I haven't gotten out much these past few months, visiting family or friends is something I don't do much of, not because I don't want to but it just isn't in me most times.

In saying that I did finally drop in  to see my brother and sister in law last night. It had been way too long. Picked up my hat that my niece had left for me(which was really nice of her to think of me), she is with the RCMP out in BC. Enjoyed hearing some of the stories about her encounters on the job. Knowing her as I do I know that she will be a great credit to the RCMP, hoping she gets stationed back here sometime.

Of course I had to start shaking, which I am sure they noticed (kind of hard not to when you are holding a cup of tea), but at least I didn't actually drop it or spill it! Bonus I did manage to stay on my feet as well!

Blogging

It is funny(or not so funny depending on what side you are on) but the world sucks big time! You see your friends with depression going around and around like on a merry-go-round. As for me, my wife says I am in a "fog",(what ever that means), or "god you look awful".

Sometimes you think the whole world is against you, but in my case I do have my little Buddy for companionship( as much as he is a pain in the butt!)

I was asked why I have a blog.

I was told I should write my thoughts in a journal(but I am not much for doing that) so my wife thought a blog would work better for me to get my thoughts out.

For me it is a way to get some of my anger out as it builds up very quick and then I do not know what to do about it and since they say that "talking" helps, this is my way of "talking".

Anger can be a very bad influence on depression if not handled and let out, it tends to turn inward, which is what i tend to do most of the time. Alot of things that come with depression always go in ward(by which I mean people tend to hold everything inside until they explode).

Tread with Caution

There comes a point in your therapy that you will be advised tell your relatives, close friends that you have depression and are being treated by a Doctor. Tread carefully!

Your family at first may not believe you mostly because they won't have noticed the signs (BUT YOU DON'T LOOK SICK.???! - It's a daily struggle feeling sick on the inside while you look fine on the outside.)

Some stay away and are hesitant to help you or try to learn and understand, some may still talk with you. It will be different for everyone depending on the amount of understanding you get. For me I needed to  stay away from family for a lot of reasons (perhaps another blog later on).

Medical Illness

Depression is a medical illness that involves the mind and body. Also called major depression, major depressive disorder and clinical depression. Iit affects how you feel, think and behave. Depression can lead to a variety of emotional and physical problems. You may have trouble doing normal day-to-day activities, and depression may make you feel as if life isn't worth living.

More than just a bout of the blues, depression isn't a weakness, nor is it something that you can simply "snap out" of. Depression is a chronic illness that usually requires long-term treatment, like diabetes or high blood pressure. But don't get discouraged. Most people with depression feel better with medication, psychological counseling or other treatment.
(Taken from the Mayo Clinic Site)

Down

Last night I had the dog out for our usual evening walk and when I came in, just got dizzy like I always do after coming in from outside (no smart remarks from the peanut gallery) and next thing I knew I was laying at the bottom of the basement stairs!Now my left side is all bruised, but I guess if that is all I have I can count myself lucky.

It has been like that all along  I am fine one minute and down the next. This is getting hard on the body,so for the first time in my life I am using the dreaded walker. Got it sucks to get old, although I know alot of "older" folks who are not in need of one so not really sure it has anything to do with my age.

Finding Answers

Off to the hospital for this EMG thing to see how bad my nerve and muscles were damaged by the 2 mini strokes I had.......I am getting to know the hospital better than some of those that work there.

Once they find this out then maybe someone can tell me why I fall and have all these headaches...I am sure my wife is getting tired of picking me up,,one minute I am standing and talking the next I am on the floor. There is no signs that I am going to fall. The only thing wehave  figured out so far is that when I stand up my blood pressure drops 20 points for 5 seconds or so. (If you see me waiting for 5 seconds after I get up from sitting I am waiting for my pressure to go back up before moving on!)

For those of you that are depressed and are looking for a place to be able to chat I have started a private group on my  FB(just  for  people with this illness, what is said there stays there, just like our meetings, the only people who can see any posts are those that have been invited to join the group).

Deeper

I seemed to have fallen deeper into my depression the past few days, not sure why, just have. Sometimes it's like a roller coaster ride. I cannot think of a trigger that set it off this time (although maybe there doesn't have to be one?) Just all of a sudden no energy, no get up and go, feel weak and just seem not to want to do a damn thing, except be by myself. Your hands shake as well, cannot even hold a glass of anything without spilling it (which is ok with the dog)!

It seems that when I get depressed all I want to do is be alone, some may same I just want to "sook" and feel sorry for myself, but in being alone I feel then I will not bring anyone else down with me especially my loved ones.

Is it fair to shut them out, probably not, but  to me at least it feels better. It is very hard when a 60 yr old man loses control of his feelings by either crying or getting very angry and is not sure which one will come out, but you can bet your bottom dollar, one will.

 I am going to go now as even writing this makes me sad, but I have been told that writing things down as I feel them (like in a diary, only in today's world it is in a blog) will help me feel a little better.

Friends?

When depression sets in, that is when you need to rely on your friends and family, and that's when  you find out if they are friends in the true sense. The stigma of depression after all these years is still there and when you tell people you have  a severe case of depression, they either do not talk to you about it, or they never call you again.

Depression IS a mental illness and it is a disease like cancer, and no one runs away from that. I am just pointing out that people with depression need friends and family too.

Talk Therapy

If medication is not for you or you want to wait to try it then "talk therapy" may be a good place to start.

Talk therapy  is one way that can help you talk about your depression. It does have its pros and cons. In this kind of therapy  it all depends on how far you want or need to go back in your life. You have to be aware and ok with knowing that what you talk about  may bring alot of hurt feelings that you thought you had hidden away out into the open again.

I have tried this a number of times, it does bring feelings from way back and for me for they produced nightmares as I  relived them all. I would sometimes wake up yelling or  spend a good portion of the night  moving my hands all about, which continued for as long as I was in talk therapy. 


Cognitive behavioral therapy (or cognitive behavioral therapies or CBT) is a psychotherapeutic approach, a talking therapy, that aims to solve problems concerning dysfunctional emotions, behaviors and cognitions through a goal-oriented, systematic procedure. The title is used in diverse ways to designate behavior therapy, cognitive therapy, and to refer to therapy based upon a combination of basic behavioral and cognitive research

Are We Being Lazy?

"Your Lazy" that is what people with depression hear all the time from those who do not understand ,and even sometimes even from those that do. You hear "shake it off", "just get your butt out of bed", "you are being lazy today", and on and on. Sometimes you just have to have a "ME" day, and for some those "ME" days might just happen a little more often.

People with depression would like nothing better than to shake it off. Some people say if you  keep yourself busy depression will not be able to come back,,,WRONG, because the more we take on the more depression slips in.
A member of the group I attend told me once he puts his alarm clock  in the hallway so when it goes off he has to get up,,,good idea ,that's one great thing about the self help group you learn various tips that you can try out. Another thing is to  write down what you want to do the next day and post it on the fridge. If  you  have 5 things on your list ,do one and do it right, leave the rest till other day.

Next time a little about "talk therapy".

What a Morning!

My depression climbed the scale a few days ago (as anyone who suffers knows it is like being on a roller coaster, up and down without warnings), on a scale of 1 to 10 I had been sitting at a 5  for this past week.

 However the scale tipped this morning driving my wife to work, I got a headache and zoned out (a topic for another day), started shaking and everything. (I know not a good thing while driving, actually while doing anything!)
She wanted to know if I wanted her to drive and I said "NO" I am fine (she hates that word!).
Well I was not fine (DUH) and refused at the time to give in, but finally I did (I guess I am finally starting to give in a little, but it is really hard to do that).

Not sure what is going on in my head lately but it sucks big time.

Results from our visit to the Brain Clinic (Neurology)

Copied from my wife,s blog

An EMG is often performed when patients have unexplained muscle weakness. The EMG helps to distinguish between muscle conditions in which the problem begins in the muscle and muscle weakness due to nerve disorders. The EMG can also be used to detect true weakness, as opposed to weakness from reduced use because of pain or lack of motivation. EMGs can also be used to isolate the level of nerve irritation or injury.

A nerve conduction velocity (NCV) test is often done at the same time as an EMG. In this test, the nerve is electrically stimulated while a second electrode detects the electrical impulse 'down-stream' from the first. The NCV test can be used to detect true nerve disorders.

This is the next stage of our process through the Neurology clinic, now that we know hubby had had 2 very small mini strokes sometime in the past. The "very small" part was good to hear, the "sometime in the past" hmmmm? You would think with all of the technology (like the CT Scan) that they could pin point a little better than sometime in the past (6 months ago, a year ago, 2 yrs ago?). Well I guess that is better than recently- Right?

Does an EMG hurt?

Yes. There is some discomfort at the time the needle electrodes are inserted. They feel like shots (intramuscular injections), although nothing is injected during an EMG. Afterwards, the muscle may feel a little sore for up to a few days.

These are the next steps that have resulted from our hospital visit yesterday.We are making progress!!

Watched them do some pretty normal looking testing like close your eyes and walk putting one foot in front of the other (like the cops would ask a suspected drunk person) with some pretty funny results! Or close your eyes and touch your nose, sounds pretty easy, but when you have sensory nerve damage (partly from the mini strokes, diabetes and depression) it isn't as easy as it sounds. Too bad I didn't have the foresight to record it!

EFT-Emotional Freedom Techniques

EFT,,,Emotional Freedom Techniques

There is a new depression Itherapy that alot of Dr's are suggesting these days called EFT. It is a form of alternative psychotherapy that uses tapping on acupuncture points while a patient focuses on a specific traumatic memory. This is said to manipulate an energy field practitioners associate with the human body.
Now some people swear by this method ,but as Critics have described the theory behind EFT as pseudoscientific and have suggested that any utility stems from its more traditional cognitive components, such as the placebo effect, the distraction from negative thoughts, and the therapeutic benefit of having someone actually listen

So as you can see the method does have it,s followers and negative followers,,,I tried one session of EFT but found that this form of therapy was definitely "not my cup of tea"! I really don't like someone "tapping" on my head, the whole time instead of feeling a sense of calming I was stressed about them tapping on me!

However that is not to say that it could not work for you.

Antidepressants

What are antidepressants, good question. There are so many and what works for one person does not work for someone else. Antidepressants are the most prescribed therapy for depression.

 The exact mechanism of action of antidepressants is unknown, antidepressants increase the concentration of one or more brain chemicals different classes of antidepressants differ in the neurotransmitters they affect, thus comes side effects, antidepressants are effective, and for most cases of depression there is no good evidence that any antidepressant is more effective than another.

Side effects and potential drug interactions influence selection of antidepressants, and like I said sometimes the side effects are worse than depression itself. It is a long process of trial and error, of which each trial probably takes a good 2-3 months. You need to be aware not to expect to see great improvements over a very short period of time, and that it could take months and months to even find one that helps rather than hinders.

Depressison Hurt

Here is a great web site about depression:
http://www.depressionhurts.ca/en/questionnaire.aspx

If you (like me) and I hope you are not,,have suicidal thoughts that take over from time to time,especially if you are down and can not get out of that big black hole, you may think at the time like I did it that it was the best thing to do to solve the problems. And until someone points things out to you afterwords, that it might be easy for me, but not for those I leave behind, for those who find me, what their mental state will be afterwards.

 Not everyone that has depression will try to take their life (thank goodness) but they say if you fail once , the odds for trying it again double and it seems most of us get another chance.

I know when I woke up first thing I thought was "I could not even do that right". We all need something or someone to help us move on, you can't do it alone.

Getting the Boot

After 2 sessions with a Neurologist thearpist, they have said that there is not much more we can do for you,
use a walker and do exercises,,,your falls do not fall into a pattern.
I told her I can't seem to let go that it feels like I am losing my own power to walk by having to use a walker.  Her answer was simple, what would people rather see, a man walking down the street with a walker or watching him fall on the street....and I had no come back for that.

So now I find myself alone once again trying to figure these things out, waiting for Mar 17, to get an EMG test done. As they say s**t just keeps on piling up except for those that have to move it.

Mini Strokes (TIA)

The name tells you what they are,,,it is bad enough when you have depression, but having 2 mini strokes at some point in time,,,sometime in the past year or so is all the hospital neurologist.

I do get tired of falling, I am sore on my left side, my hip is killing me and when I go to bed ,I can only lay on the left side for 5 minutes.You get dizzy, you seem to be in another world, and if you stand up too fast, your blood pressure drops and you fall,  yet no one can say why this happens.

Is it part of the mini stroke when your blood pressure drops,some say yes,,,some say they do not know,,what a medical profession we have (you would think with all of the advances medicine makes they could find out the associations by now).

I was told to use a walker, so we went out and spent $250.00 on one, and yes I know I have to use it, but it is a very hard thing to accept ,especially if you are a proud person, but if it saves you from falling then using it will become a must,,,,still a hard thing to do.

I will keep my updates on going...hope any of what I write here helps those with depression and stokes..smile one and all,,,not much use not to.

Depression

When people hear you say you are depressed,  they all seem to say at some point
in time I was depressed as well. When you try to explain it is not the same thing,  they
quicly turn and say that you will get over it soon, and that really pisses me off.

Depression is/can effect anyone, holds no age barrierr, male or female, young or old. If you have been really depressed you know how stressing and painful it can be, not just to yourself, but to all your loved ones and all youcan do is hope they stay with you and understand.

In my case I have a great spouse who, reads up on depression, sees how it hurts me and her. She does not understand it all, neither do I but we both try to get through this one day at a time.I would be very lost with out her by my side each day.

Depression is an illness with  no hard and fast cure as of yet. It is a desease that seems to have no end in sight, once you are in that black tunnel you fight like hell to take a step forward,only to be knocked 2 steps back (that is the way it seems to be for me anyway).

It can be a hard fight and if you manage to get a day here ot there without any stumbling then it is a GREAT Day.

Round 1 Again

Well, after seeing a number of psychiatrists already, I have to say that I have never met anyone like the man I was sent to see last week.
I had never met him before and after 5 minutes with him, he kept on asking me "how do I feel towards him"?
I mean really what is that  supposed to mean when you first see a person, how are you supposed to know that? He is "old school" and not a very likeable personality. I can see this clash is not going to go well.

I kept telling him I did not understand the question, and he just sat there saying the same thing.I think he knew he was starting to push my buttons and finally I said I have no feelings towards him as I just
met him, give me a few more sessions and I am sure I will get to tell you.

Unfortunately in Canada you need these specialists to prescribe the drugs you need when you are depressed  as your GP can only go so far, they are not a specialist in that field. This was the only reason that I was going to see him, but all this guy (god knows how much he is being paid) starts out with these stupid questions and does not want to discuss medications yet. Great! Just what I need is to have to go through the same discussions I have already gone through with two other psychiatrists I had already seen before. Haven't figured out yet if it is worth it or not.

Stay tuned for around two